I have been having some trouble sleeping recently thanks to some very stressful dreams. I was helping to plan D-Day in one, Aaron Rodgers and I were fending off zombie bears (the animal not the team), and last night, I was building a house that kept falling down...we were building it out of colorful strips of paper in a windy field so maybe my subconscious should plan better next time. but we also had a fleet of flying cars...Weren't we supposed to have flying cars by 2000? I know for sure Stanley Kubrick promised me an LSD-like space adventure to the meaning and beginning of life by 2001 and didn't deliver...but let's think about this flying car thing...
I know the first thing I would use a flying car for is to get out of traffic...but then so would probably everyone else. Would it be a mad zig zagging spree? would we be flying through a shooting range of thousands of Chevy Malibus colliding and careening into the surrounding skyscrapers??
"What happens if my engine goes out?"
"DON'T let your engine go out!"
Fender benders would turn from a slight inconvenience or worse, a shouting match, into a two-hundred foot plummet to a fiery death. (At least you'd have time to post a last photo to facebook) Drunk drivers wouldn't only swerve, they would roller coaster straight through your roof and onto your couch next to you... "Hey Richard, how long has this charred tanker truck been lodged in the ceiling?" And OH MAN, what happens if you toss something out the window? We no longer have polluted highways, we have cigarettes, vomit, cold coffee, and three month old, rock-hard stale Mchamburgers hurtling like cannonballs onto beach goers below...maybe that's the D-day connection...
Only in Michael Bay's dreams, or apparently mine
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